Author Archives: Dr. Cranky

About Dr. Cranky

Dr. Cranky is a residency-trained, board-certified emergency physician who has been fighting in the trenches of American medicine for far too long. Each day he tries to stay one step ahead of burnout. Despite his best efforts, burnout seems to be closing in fast.

Failure can be the best option

Greetings, gentle reader.  In Ron Howard’s 1995 semi-biographical movie Apollo 13 the situation is desperate.  There has been a devastating explosion on board Odyssey, the command module of America’s third manned mission to the moon.  The spacecraft is dying and … Continue reading

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The Mozart Effect

Greetings, gentle reader.  In his prior post Dr. Cranky discussed the myth of the Natural and outlined why belief in such a fictitious character is dangerous to anyone who wants to achieve something in life.  Your esteemed medical misanthrope would … Continue reading

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The Natural

Greetings, gentle reader.  One of the most enduring characters to be found in popular culture is that of the “Natural.”  This is a person who possesses such innate talent, intellectual brilliance or preternatural ability that he is able to transcend … Continue reading

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Suffering from Self-Esteem

One of Dr. Cranky’s favorite things to do, once he has successfully chewed through his restraints and escaped his captors, is to go to book stores.  There is one establishment in particular where your favorite author likes nothing more than … Continue reading

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Weevils

Greetings, Gentle Reader.  If you have been following the adventures of Dr. Cranky for a while, you might have noticed an odd dissonance in his discourse.  It is something you can’t quite put your finger on.  Like a nascent sneeze … Continue reading

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The Algorithmic Doctor

Greetings, gentle reader.  Dr. Cranky has returned once again, filled to the brim with black bile, melancholia and lugubriousness as he sits in his padded cell experiencing a moment of transient lucidity.  And what is the source of your correspondent’s … Continue reading

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Decompression Sickness

“There’s a pediatric drowning in Resus Bay 2,” the charge nurse said to the young Dr. Cranky, “they need you in there now.”  Your earnest host had been in his residency program for less than a month when he heard … Continue reading

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Welcome to Dr. Cranky’s New Home!

Welcome, dear reader.  Your earnest host is most pleased that you’ve found your way to his new site!  “Dr. Cranky,” you might ask, “what has happened that would prompt you to move your blog to a different venue?  Have you … Continue reading

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Press Ganey is for Mature Audiences Only

Greetings gentle reader. It is time once again for your favorite scrivener, keyboard in hand, to journey forth and regale you with his tales of death, decay and diagnostic derring-do. Although Dr. Cranky would like to say that his recent … Continue reading

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A Discourse on Zebras

Greetings, gentle reader. Dr. Cranky regrets to report, once again, that he has neglected to refill his psychotropic medications. As a consequence, the only way your faithful scrivener can stop the voices in his head is to take to his … Continue reading

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